Premarital Fundamentals excerpt

To build and maintain a solid foundation for marital relationships requires that the partners develop BASIC UNDERSTANDING about each other’s life style, character, likes, hobbies, weakness, strength, and basic understanding about so many other things. And that is what purpose driven courtship does. These days, courtship is taken as a time to engage in marathon sex, enjoy and merry. Premarital sex is completely against the rule of ideal courtship. Courtship is a time to get to know each other a little bit more and find out if you guys are compatible enough to make a harmonious relationship. The partners need the basic understanding that they are not perfect beings so they must to create rooms for surprises in form of disappointments. Yes, disappointment. I liken this to a shock absorber built in a car. The impacts of a car passing through pot holes with its shock absorber are minimal. So preparing for surprises minimizes shocks when the other person behaves as least as expected. This will enable you to withstand any shock and prepare you on how best to handle such. Foundation for marital relationship requires that the partners have the basic understanding that marriage is not a bed of roses, it is not always smooth and sometimes it could be rough. Couples may have romantic experience today and have a quarrelsome tomorrow. Some come into the institution hoping that ‘my man’ will provide me with all that my parents couldn’t provide for me. Well, that is unrealistic. Sometimes, a partner may remember a terrible experience and that could affect his or her moment or even romantic life. At such times, you don’t expect your marriage to be rosy, it is rather a time to understand and support.(an excerpt from our e-book-PREMARITAL FUNDAMENTALS BY Chisom UdoChukwu Anyanwu)